breath deeply...dream elusively

sometimes i wonder (where i am)

Saturday, December 09, 2006

Lets see

Oh man, it’s been one of those weeks. But were not going to talk about that. I just wanted to post for the sake of sharing very airy, impersonal thoughts on life, not particularly my life though.

Let’s talk about a different life. The life of Jesus. Whats up with this guy? What was he talking about? Does anyone care to know? Anyone care to find out? I dare you to get messy, ask questions, and defy commonalities. Sorry, sometimes I make up words, commonalities probably isn’t a word. How about, defy the norm or defy conformity, something of that nature.

Im still trying to grasp the idea of Jesus, I will always be trying in a way, and always be content in another way. There are some things with Christianity I doubt and some things I am very, very certain about. Certain because they are undeniably true, indeed these things simple are. They just are. I am often attempting to accept them as true. But these things are true and the whole thing in life is just accepting them.

Just accepting Him

So I suppose I could say that in my inner man, I know Jesus is real and alive inside of me. I think its true beyond a shadow of a doubt, yet my mortal attitude questions it, the influences of the world try to disprove it, and my carnal soul often falls prey to lies, idolatry, and stupidity. Yet every one of my questions get answered, but not in this mortal format im used to. Not this answer format that school has taught me, or that organized religion has even taught me. It’s nothing close to being formulaic. It’s the other stuff, the other answers, you could say the universal answers, or the conscientious answers, or, shoot, the universally conscientious answers, and because they are universal like this I would call these answers more valid. Its the real stuff.

Verbal communication is such a small part of life, they say, what, it makes up 10 percent of communication? Yet we go and demand our answers in verbal or scripted forms. How foolish! What a contradiction that man falls into. We always fall into them, let me say, probably everyday.

So we seek our answers, answers to life, God, justice, peace, war, relationships, we seeks answers to all these things in a verbal way, but this is silly, seeking verbal answers is simply foolish. What about the deaf and mute and blind? Try communicating to them verbally and its a different story, they read you differently. God can communicate clearly verbally and non verbally.

Well, coming along now, I would say that every question I honestly put out to God is answered, undeniably, but also in a way that is special and unique to me. God speaks to me in my language. How beautiful.

He speaks to me in almost seemingly inhuman ways, but really the ways he speaks to me are utterly human. He speaks to me with hope, with peace, with strength, with wisdom, with people, through people, with intuition, yes, and even with words and script. A quite reliable and amazing script I do say, one we call the Bible.

If this seems foreign, or eastern, or wacky, or unscientific then change your thinking.

This relationship that God has with us is not unlike relationships many humans have with one another. Parents teach and talk to their children and an individual level. Their love for each child is the same but it is expressed in different ways. Likewise we humans each receive different talents, gifts, blessings from God; we just have to trust that God knows best. Trust and faith are key elements in our life walks. Good school teachers also will teach and interact with their students in special and unique ways as well, treating each student a little differently depending on their most effective learning style.

Depending on their most effective learning style.

If you think about your own circles, your own friends, you will see that you yourself treat them differently. Its not a question of love, its a question of individuality. I would say that many of our relationships are based upon things such as hope, peace, strength, wisdom, and more seemingly strange forms of communication.

So, I would say in conclusion that questioning is good. Very good. But get ready for your questions to be answered in a way that is uncomfortable for us, a way that is not as clear cut as we would like and maybe a form that is completely detestable in our minds but completely adorable in our souls. Even so, be as ready as you want to be, if your not looking for these answers then your questions probably will not get answered. Look to the Bible for every answer, talk to God, and communicate with him. Bring questions before reliable sources.

I just heard a great brother say, "Do you think that God that created communication doesn't know how to communicate with us?" How dare we think that. He is more then able, He is God and can be your God.

So...

ask questions

look and be aware of the answers

expect to see them





Im telling you, im a different person when im low on sleep.



all in all: bleh

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